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It’s early when I wake in the morning, but after nine hours of sleep, I can’t stay in bed any longer. Yesterday had been tough, and I’ve now been demoted to the playroom. I guess it’s probably for the best whilst I work through my issues and decide what I want.I’d stupidly allowed my emotions to cloud my decisions yesterday, which will now make everything ten times harder. I’m in love with two people, both of whom fulfil something I need in my life. Originally, this wouldn’t have been a problem, but now I’m in a position where I need to choose. I cannot dedicate myself to my Master entirely with Selena around.I know I’m not right for Selena as I am at the moment. I’m still grieved by the loss of my daughter from my life, and those feelings from last week haven’t improved, they’ve only got worse. It hadn’t been entirely sub drop, and those niggling thoughts at the back of my mind from December are resurfacing. I’m swaying towards running into the safety of my Master’s bonds.My phone starts to ring on the cabinet next to me, so I answer it, and hear Selena’s cheerful voice on the other end.”Hi, Selena. I wasn’t expecting a call this early,” I respond, trying to sound upbeat.”Hey, Matt. I’ve just woken up and was dying to hear your voice. Did you sleep well?” she says, sounding happy.”I got a good nine hours. Did you have a good sleep? You passed out on me early,” I laugh.”I sure did. You exhausted me!””I wish I could have exhausted you some more this morning,” I tease.”Me too. I was getting used to waking up on Sunday morning with you.””I’d rather have woken up with you on me. You were so hot riding me yesterday, and when you sat on my face, it was like looking upon a goddess. I’m horny thinking back on it,” I sigh.”Are you turned on right now? Maybe you can do what you did last time?””Last time? Do you mean when I touched myself whilst you listened? That’s a very dirty suggestion, Selena. I might be able to oblige if you do it too?”I hear her giggling over the phone. I’ve never been comfortable doing this with anyone else, but I feel so relaxed with her. I reach down and grasp myself firmly as I turn my speakerphone on. I’m allowing myself to get carried away again.”This is the first time I’ve ever done it like this before” she breathes. “What are you doing exactly?””I want to know what you’re imagining I’m doing? Describe it for me.””Well, I think you’re holding your penis and masturbating… Oh god, I’m not used to talking dirty.””It’s fine,” I say trying to reassure her. “How big am I?””Mm, well I know you’re eight inches and girthy. It’s the kind of cock you wonder if you can fit into your mouth because it’s so big…””My sweet girl always gives it amazing attention. I love letting you have your way with it. How does it feel inside?” I whisper, gently running my hands over my cock.”Good, so good. I feel so full with you inside me,” she sighs. “I wish you were here right now fucking my pussy with your thick cock from behind.””I love feeling your tight pussy clenching around me as I fuck you. I love hearing you crying out as I get deep inside you,” I growl speeding up as I pump myself and feel my precum dripping over my hand. “I can’t wait to be between your thighs again with you sitting on my face, forcing me to lick up your delicious juices.””I want to feel what it’s like when you cum inside me. I want you to keep filling me up all day long,” she moans.Now that is a dirty thought, and I feel myself getting close to peaking as I imaging her pussy overflowing with my cum. Fluid bonded to Liam only, we’ve never been allowed to forgo condoms. I’d love to feel how soft and wet her pussy gets as I pleasure her.”Ah babe, I’d love to do that too. I want to tie you down and fuck you over and over again until you’re dripping with me,” I sigh.”Ahh! Oh, fuck,” she cries out, sooner than I had expected.I hear Selena’s quiet moans as she orgasms which makes me smile. I want to go down on her and taste that release. I need to go further than having phone sex today. I grasp my balls firmly and squeeze as I speed up my strokes, building my pleasure higher.With a deep groan, I cum over my stomach. We weren’t even talking that dirty, but my imagination is running in overdrive. The memory of Selena’s pussy on my face yesterday, and now me tying her down and filling her up has been too much.”That was different,” Selena giggles. “I’d like Gölbaşı escort bayan to see you today…””I’m not sure, Selena…””Come on? Let’s do something today to take your mind off of everything.”I contemplate what she’s asking. I guess a change of scenery may help me clear my mind a little, and it’ll keep me out of Liam’s way for a few hours.”Okay. I’ll get showered, and I’ll be right over then. See you soon!”Within twenty minutes, I’m washed and dressed in some jeans and a black In Flames vest top. Liam’s bedroom door is closed, and there’s no sign of him, so I leave him a note on the fridge. I skip breakfast too eager to get out and take my mind off of everything for a bit.Selena is waiting for me outside when I pull up, and as usual, she looks beautiful in a belted skater skirt and a Kiss t-shirt. She is honestly one of the most attractive women I have ever met. I open the door for her, and she sits next to me in my car.”Good morning Selena!” I beam at her.”Morning. So what would you like to do today?””I’m starving so anywhere with food would be great,” I respond, feeling my stomach growl.”Well, we should do something fun to cheer you up.””Fun? Like what?”She remains quiet, and I’m sure she has no idea of what to do. I lean on my arm whilst I wait and smile at her. She’s trying to make me happy, and I find it endearing.”Have you been roller skating before?” she eventually asks.”Never,” I grin.”Well, that settles it! You need to go at least once,” she says, looking pleased with herself.Selena switches on some Queen and we both sing-along on the short, twenty-minute journey to the roller rink. Even if rollerskating ended up being a complete disaster, it’s nice to be out with good company. After parking my car, I grab a long sleeve t-shirt I’d discarded from my back seat and change into it. Selena eyes me hungrily and licks her lips.”See something yummy? I tease.”Yeah, for the snack sitting before me. Maybe we should have just had fun back at mine,” she muses.”What kind of fun would that be?””The kind that makes me weak at the knees and crying out your name?””It sounds great, but I really don’t want to pass up on this opportunity to see you fall flat on your face,” I laugh.She slaps my arm playfully.”Fat chance! I used to be good at roller skating.””Used to? Do you mean when you were five? Did you have those yellow and blue adjustable ones?””Shh, as if you’ll do any better,” she scoffs.”I’ve tried inline skates, and I was skateboarding regularly up until I was eighteen,” I smirk.”Why did you stop? You need to get a skateboard and show me sometime,” she says excitedly.”Well, I could, but I have to be careful now. My leg isn’t great since my accident. Now come on, I thought you’d show me some fun today, Selena.”The roller rink is relatively empty when we arrive and dated. The ceiling is tiled with black and white squares, there’s fluorescent lighting on the walls, and a disco ball is hanging in the middle of the rink. Cheesy disco music is playing loudly, and it’s like walking straight through a time warp to the eighties.I hand over the money to some disinterested teenager, and she places some boots on the counter that look gross and equally smelly. Apprehensively I pick them up and hand a pair to Selena.”Uhh, isn’t this nice,” Selena says as she giggles.”It’s something… Actually, it’s amazing, and I’m already having the best time,” I admit.”I bet it’s fun in a group on a Friday night.””I’ve just realised I’m under-dressed. I knew I should have worn my pink hotpants and dayglow shirt!””Don’t forget the legwarmers,” Selena adds.”Goes without saying. Same with the matching headband.””I wouldn’t be surprised if you actually own clothing like that. I guess we’re going to give it a go?””I paid a tenner. I’m definitely getting my money’s worth of fun. The last one to the rink buys the slush puppies and chips afterwards!”I quickly run off playfully to the seating area to pull off my trainers and put the boots on. Tentatively I then make my way to the rink over the tacky, confetti printed carpet and find that Selena has beaten me.”I win!” she yells, pointing at me then booping me on the nose.”Yeah, well I deliberately went slow to let you win. A gentleman always pays.””Of course you did…”When we step out onto the wooden floor, Selena immediately grabs hold of the side and squeals, Escort Keçiören not feeling safe. I can’t help but laugh as I skate backwards, showing off.”Bit different when you’re no longer five years old, isn’t it Selena,” I tease.”How are you even doing that?””Doing what?” I grin.”Not falling over and going backwards.””Oh, you just point your feet in a V shape and kinda just push your heels apart. You need to practice just standing up and going forward first,” I say as I skate towards her and grab hold of her hand.”I’m scared!””You need to let go and hold on to me. I’ll keep you safe,” I smile.She reluctantly releases the side with her other hand and falls towards me.”This was a terrible idea!””Haha! Well, I’m having great fun already so I think it’s brilliant. Just bend your knees and keep your weight low, towards your heels and not your toes. If you do fall then fall forwards.””Fall forwards? Oh god, I’m going to fall over!””You’ll be fine. Trust me,” I try to reassure her.Slowly I start guiding her around the rink with me. Several times she wobbles as she loses her balance, but I help her stay upright, and she begins to relax. I’m impressed that she hasn’t completely chickened out despite being scared, although we remain at our snail’s pace.Forty minutes later, Selena’s legs are aching so we remove our boots and I buy some food as agreed.”Here you go. Eat up!””Two portions of chips and burgers? I thought we were just getting something small?””Well here’s the thing, Liam hasn’t allowed me to eat anything like this since I met him. If I’m having a cheat day, I’m doing it properly and not sharing,” I grin.I take a huge bite out of my burger. It’s not great, but after going without for so long, I sigh happily.”Good?” she asks, slurping her drink.”It tastes really cheap, but it’s like heaven after not having one in months. This is my vice. I love savoury, greasy food. This is so good it’s better than sex. Fuck me, I’m gonna have to do this again.””Behind Liam’s back?” she laughs.”Fuck, yes. This is so filthy and delicious he’s going to be furious if he knows about it! You wanna be my buddy when I do the dirty on him? I’ll buy you free food or give you anything you want if you keep this a secret.””Anything I want? Sex?””Do you ever think of anything but sex?””Well, I like cake and chocolate. Serve it to me from off your body, and I’ll be the happiest girl in the world. Maybe some ice cream too?””I’ll put that on my list of things to consider. It’s incredibly vanilla if we don’t consider me getting my balls frozen off from the ice cream.””Is it a deal then?” she asks, her face looking hopeful.”I’ll let you know.”I check my phone and see five missed calls from Liam. I need to go back, and I get a sinking feeling. It seems like he finally wants to talk to me again and I’m dreading it after yesterday. I hate arguing with him.”You okay?” Selena asks with concern.”Yeah, I just need to head back, unfortunately.”Selena shifts uncomfortably in her seat and frowns. I think she has a few things on her mind that she needs to discuss with me. It’s probably best that we get it out of the way.”Could you tell me about what happened yesterday, Matt? Liam said something about ownership?” she asks, wringing her hands.”I guess we should talk about that. Liam told me he regrets being in a relationship with me because he finds me difficult. He wants to be able to dictate everything about my life to the point I belong to him. I’ve got two weeks to decide, and in the meantime, it seems like we’re on a break.””I didn’t realise. Why is he being like this?””Because I do reckless things without thinking of the consequences first. I can be rude and argumentative plus I got in that fight. Liam is a complete control freak, so he can’t handle it,” I sigh.”But why would he want to change you? I love your personality! You’re interesting and passionate about the things you like. Would that stop that part of you? Will, you ever get downtime? You can’t surely be considering it?””I don’t know what to do. I love Liam. I’m open to compromising with him and having a certain amount of days as his days, but I need some space.”Selena looks saddened by my response. She probably realises that the current arrangement will end if I choose to accept what Liam is asking for. If I go down the full servitude route, I cannot switch. Kızılay escort Yesterday had definitely been a bad idea. Despite having feelings for her, I should encourage her to move on and find someone more suitable.”I want to be able to still see you,” Selena says quietly as she stares into her drink and stirs it with her straw.I quickly reach out and grab hold of her other hand, resting on the table, startling her.”Selena, I know I said it yesterday, but you should be with someone who you can have an actual relationship with, not me or Liam. I want what’s best for you.””Maybe what’s best for me is you?” Selena says firmly with a determined look in her eyes.”I assure you it really isn’t. I’m a complete waste of space, and I hurt everyone who gets close to me. I could be going away for up to five years. I also cannot give you what you deserve whilst I serve Liam’s needs.””But, I have feelings for you! I told you yesterday that I loved you when we made love. I don’t mind sharing you with Liam, but please don’t stop seeing me entirely.”We did make love yesterday, and it does make me feel happy to hear how much she cares about me, but I don’t feel like I’m right for her. All I’ve ever done is let others down, and it’s only a matter a time until I upset her too.”Those feelings should be for someone who deserves you. I’ll always be your friend if you’ll have me, but I am not capable of being a decent human being. You need to try dating someone else, properly. I’ll be like your big brother if the wrong guy comes along and upsets you, but I can’t be more than that.””It sounds like you’ve made your decision?” Selena says sadly.”I really haven’t. I make poor choices often. I already know what the best choice will be, but my heart is difficult to sway from what I want.””What do you want?””For Liam to love me the way I am,” I respond guiltily.Selena picks up her handbag and the skates from the floor beside her with tears in her eyes. I’ve upset her which hadn’t been my intention. I slowly follow her to my car, handing in the boots on my way.The drive is in silence this time, and as much as I’d like to spend more time with Selena, I end up just saying goodbye to her as she gets out my car. She looks crestfallen that I wasn’t planning to sleep with her despite the disagreement we’ve just had.”You’re not coming in first?” Selena says quietly, fidgeting with the frayed edge of her sleeve.”Selena, I had a lovely time with you. I really did, but I need to deal with some things. I need to do some thinking about what Liam is asking of me.””Why don’t you just break up with him and choose to only be with me?””I love him, Selena. I met him before I met you. I’m also not right for you, and I don’t want you to hate me like everyone else does when something inevitably goes wrong.””I don’t think I’ll ever be able to hate you,” Selena smiles weakly. “I guess I’ll see you next week, then?””Maybe, but I can’t guarantee it. Take care of yourself, Selena.”As I watch her turn around and walk back towards her dorm, I feel guilty again. I wish there was a way to keep both of them happy in my life even if Selena is just my friend.——I arrive back home feeling apprehensive. I need to see if I can get Liam to reconsider. Surprisingly, Liam isn’t waiting for me in the hallway when I walk through the door. After yesterday, I was sure I’d find him sitting here, drinking again.”Liam? I’m home,” I call out.I place my keys on the sideboard and walk upstairs. I don’t find him in the study, but I see that his bedroom door is closed, so I knock on it. There’s no answer, so I open the door and see Liam curled up in his bed looking pathetic with an empty bottle of wine at the side of the bed. I sigh loudly, then enter, closing the door behind me.”What are we going to do with you?” I say gently.”Go away!””I’m not going anywhere, Liam.””You’ve been out fucking Selena again. You prefer her to me,” he accuses angrily.I cross the room and sit down on the edge of the bed without invitation.”I assure you I’ve not had sex today if we don’t count me being friendly with my hand this morning.””So where have you been?””Just out, thinking. I did see Selena, but mostly I’ve been thinking about us.””You went on a date with Selena?””I wouldn’t call it a date. I didn’t even kiss her. I just wanted someone I could bounce my feelings around with. I struggle to make decisions, and I’m afraid of being rash. Saying them aloud to another helps.”Liam sits bolt upright in the bed at the mention of me making a decision. He appears older than his age today as I keenly look upon his face and make eye contact with him.”So you’ve made your choice?””Maybe. I need to think about it some more.”

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